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If you think a loved one is secretly drinking, it could mean they are at risk of alcoholism. In this article, you will find out more about the signs and symptoms of secret drinking and what to do about it.
If you are concerned that you or a loved one is developing a damaging relationship with alcohol through secret drinking, help is available.
Anything from underexaggerating how much you drink to keeping alcoholic drinks hidden in desk drawers can count as secret drinking. The idea is being secretive about how much or even that you are drinking at all.
It might seem like anyone who is secretly drinking is hiding alcoholism, but that isn’t necessarily the case. However, it is well worth keeping an eye out for signs of alcoholism if you find a loved one is drinking in secret. If someone seems withdrawn, depressed and drinks constantly despite negative consequences, these are signs they may be struggling with alcoholism.
In some places and social groups, all alcohol is frowned upon or not allowed. This includes many religious and cultural groups as well as families and workplaces. Given the shame involved, even people who occasionally drink socially might keep it secret from people in their social group.
Growing up with a family member with alcoholism can lead to secret drinking out of learned behaviour. Even if someone is not drinking in a negative or dangerous way they might feel compelled to hide it out of habit, shame or fear.
Treat anyone with a family history of alcoholism with care and kindness to prevent making the problem worse. It is important to be aware, though, that people with an alcoholic parent are statistically more likely to fall into alcoholism themselves.
People in controlling or abusive relationships might hide any drinking from a spouse or partner out of fear. If someone you know mentions hiding even a normal amount of drinking from someone they are in a relationship with, they may be a victim of abuse and controlling behaviour. People in these situations may hide social drinking or visits to places with alcohol and seem afraid of being found out.
It is important to remember that alcoholism isn’t a choice, but that doesn’t mean that trying to help won’t be frustrating. Sometimes, you feel like you do not want to bother anymore, and the urge to walk away is sometimes strong.
Approaching someone you suspect is secretly drinking will require patience and little expectation. It is unlikely that their response will be positive, as you will threaten what they think they need the most.
Spotting the signs isn’t easy; the main aim of someone secretly drinking is to deceive. So much of the person’s energy will go into thinking about how to hide their alcohol intake, but we can’t permanently hide everything.
Let us look at the common signs of secret drinking.
Not all of the signs are included in this list. So, it is vital to think outside the box when looking for patterns and correlations when flagging the signs of secret alcoholism.
Those who want to hide how much alcohol they consume will find various ways to hide it. Below are some of the most common methods of concealing our drinking habits.
Someone who regularly hides how much they drink will carry strong mints or chewing gum around with them, as well as mouthwash, which can be a helpful way of masking while also providing a source of alcohol.
Hiding the amount of alcohol might sound obvious, but how we can conceal alcohol is not so obvious. Let’s take vodka, for example, it is clear and is easily replaced with water, or you may start buying boxes of wine instead of bottles. It is not uncommon for secret drinkers to hide alcohol in a shampoo bottle or a water bottle, or the classic flask. Whatever doesn’t raise suspicion.
Stashing bottles around the house may sound similar to hiding alcohol in shampoo bottles or a flask, but it is different. An alcohol stash increases the chances of taking a secret drink in passing by hiding bottles at the back of cupboards, behind the couch or even in the car. If you happen to find alcohol in an unusual place, then you could be living with someone who has an alcohol addiction.
Another sign, which may be subtle depending on who it is, is not wanting to get close. For example, if someone is suddenly acting distant, it could be that they don’t want you to smell the alcohol on their breath.
Spotting the signs and symptoms of alcoholism in yourself or another can be vital to gaining access to life-saving treatment. Still, it isn’t always straightforward, especially to the untrained eye. The difference between drinking too much and full-blown alcoholism is significant. So, it is essential to be able to differentiate between the two.
Talking about secret drinking can be difficult. Telling someone you love that you know they are drinking in secret might cause denial to emerge, whatever the cause.
Here are some tips for talking to someone about hidden drinking:
